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Podcast Episode 03 - Empath Unplugged with Esther Bertram

Why & How Can Empaths Detangle form Others?

As an empath, it’s important to learn how to set boundaries and detach from toxic relationships. This podcast episode, Esther will share strategies why and how to do just that. You’ll learn how to identify when a relationship is no longer serving your highest good and how to let go of people who don’t support your growth. By doing this, you’ll be able to protect yourself and be more effective in helping others.

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Full Transcription

00:01
Esther Bertram
Welcome to empath unplugged. A frequent release podcast of RAW and philosophical reflections on wellbeing, love and the meaning of life brought to you by your host, Esther Bertram, founder of the Inzel, a rejuvenation island and community. For empaths, expect topics such as philosophy, psychology, art, culture, spirit, science, holistic health and the occasional beach fire song to be part of your wonder ride to your Oceanside escape. It's time to breathe in the salty air and bask in the soothing, warm sun to relax, reflect and vibe along with a fellow empath to rejuvenate. Hello listeners, welcome to today's podcast episode number three from the Cold and Rainy and quite miserable insult today.
00:54
Esther Bertram
It's gray skies out there and I'm rugged up in a dressing gown and a blanket. And it's probably quite appropriate for this topic. Today's topic is why and how to detangle. And it's a topic very close to my heart for two reasons, one. Tangling reminds me of spaghetti and I must say pasta is my number one food of all time. I love spaghetti, but in the right context, in this podcast there are sometimes. Spaghetti could be the little devil and not a good thing to be involved with anyway we'll jump into that strange metaphor later. And secondly, I have spent a big chunk of my adult life in the process of detangling.
01:46
Esther Bertram
I think it's a common thing for empaths to go through once we are become aware of. How we've accidentally become entwined with certain people and even workplaces and situations. Because we're so good at saying yes and so good at wanting to help others and open our hearts and minds before we become conscious of the need to consider our own wellbeing as number one priority, we can end up in dynamics and situations that are detrimental to. Ourselves and others and ultimately stop us from having much energy and time to give to the world. Because we're in such a. Tangled Nation, and so I'm making this podcast because I've spent a lot of time detangling and if I can help any other empath in any way, even with just a little idea how they could speed up the process to detangle, then I'm happy because my mission is to try to help other empaths because I really believe in.
02:55
Esther Bertram
The big hearts they are and the ability when we are shining strong, super empaths, we can really impact the world in a much bigger way. So if I can play a part in helping empaths shine, then I feel like I'm doing the job I'm meant to do. So that's why I've chosen this topic. And 1st I want to dive into the why we would want to detangle? I covered a little bit just then, but I think feeling empowered. I think most people want to feel empowered. Empaths or non empaths or anyone on the spectrum of having even a bit of empathy. We all like to feel empowered in our life and when we are serving other people's agendas above our own and getting swayed and pushed and pulled and caught up in.
03:52
Esther Bertram
Other missions that are serving other people and actually doing bad things to our own health. It's not a very pleasant situation to be in. We can end up feeling drained and often a big problem is we can't even tune into our own inner voice because. We're overwhelmed with the voices and wishes of others. And yeah, I think it's the why is because we want to feel empowered. We want to be effective as people.
04:29
Esther Bertram
And we want to strengthen ourselves so we can be even more sustainably impactful for ourselves and others. So that would be a core reason for me, and that has been a core reason to get untangled from dynamics that don't serve the higher highest good of the participants. And especially considering. Empaths putting themselves a bit higher as well, I think we're very good at serving others, but I think the new dawn is here where empaths can feel confident to shine brightly as number one and will jump into my theory cause I think I can't ever help not.
05:14
Esther Bertram
I think I'm always gonna talk about my theory because it's my reference point to put everything on because it helps my brain make sense of things so. If you haven't heard the first episodes, I'd talk a little bit about the theory. I'll just quickly cover it. For those of you just tuned into this first time. Welcome new listeners, and basically I created a theory in my twenties called the one two three. Theory if you want to learn more, you can head over to the 1-2-3 theory.com I'm writing a book about it at the moment and this podcast is all different topics that are like branches, branches off the tree of the 1-2-3 theory and basically it's a theory that states for the sustainable.
06:02
Esther Bertram
Energy and love to give to the world we need to be in the order of the 1-2-3 and one is ourselves. Two is our loved ones and close family and friends. Three is the rest of the world and. By default, most empaths are born or grow into being to what I call 2-1 threes. We are where we give to others first before ourselves and just by doing that we actually burn out and we don't have anything left for the number 3.
06:29
Esther Bertram
Our impact and a contribution to the world. Or some of us end up as three two ones, which is being very coarse and mission driven. And that comes before even our connections with our friends and family. And our well being at the end. So it's 3-2-1 And that's fine for a short period, but the point of the theory is it's not sustainable, and if you look at a whole lifetime of time and you want to have the maximum impact over that lifetime.
07:02
Esther Bertram
My theory states that you need to be a 1-2-3 to have the biggest. Output by the very end. Otherwise, yeah, you can do short term little births, but you just can't make the distance. It's like learning how, as an empath, how to be a marathon runner. And yeah, making the long the long distance anyway. Let's bring it back to this situation and when we. Are in a tangle nation often a very common one is being a 2-1-3 and that's when we are entwined with something.
07:42
Esther Bertram
I'm going to just talk about romantic relationships at the moment because this is a very common thing, especially for empaths who haven't really understood their own. Default settings and the way they are they we end up. I'll just go from my own experience and I've seen it in friends as well. We end up in situations quite often, actually with narcissists because or people with narcissistic tendencies because they are what I call a double one two three.
08:12
Esther Bertram
They have themselves and then they have another number, one for themselves. And then maybe a two three or a three two at the end. And when you're at 2-1-3 that fits together like a jigsaw into a double one two three, because the two is prioritising them. And because they have two ones, cause they're so important and the world goes around them. You just plug in like a jigsaw piece. And it's happened to me a couple of times in my earlier in my twenties, hence me giving birth to the theory and needing to work out how to not do that again because it's not very healthy.
08:51
Esther Bertram
That's why I created the theory and then overtime I've practiced and experimented with what it is like to be a 1-2-3 which is much healthier, and I'm now at a point in my life where. My one is really quite balanced. I have really good twos which is if you have healthy twos, which is your relationships. They are mutually beneficial. They are not. You give give and they take in friendships and work and relationships.
09:26
Esther Bertram
Which I have done in all three of those departments a lot. These days I work with people when it's mutually beneficial. These days my friendships are mutually beneficial. These days my relationships are mutually beneficial. And because of that. And I have my one thriving and I have mutually beneficial relationships. I have all this extra energy for number three 's contribution and So what I'm doing with that is I'm doing this podcast.
09:59
Esther Bertram
I'm writing a book, I run a community. I run a publishing house. I'm head of marketing or chief marketing. I was promoted so I can have to put the new name. I'm chief marketing officer for another company. I have a million things on the go and I generally handle them all quite well and I think it's because of the theory and I have. That excess energy to spend if I zip back to my twenties, and when I think about one particular relationship I was in, which I was hardcore 2-1-3 With a very narcissistic person who was a double one two three, my whole time was spent analyzing their relationship, trying to work out what I'm doing wrong, what he's doing wrong, what, how I ended up there, what did he mean when he said that why? Why does he want me to do that all about him? Him, him, him.
10:56
Esther Bertram
I couldn't even focus on. Obviously had a music career at the time in Europe and doing a lot of touring and. You trying to record my next album before the tour and it was really hard to. Have my headspace and hot space, I mean on the positive it did give me good resources to write songs about because it was very challenging emotionally and so I had the outlet of music. But honestly it was not as impactful as I wish it could be so. I urge all. Empaths, especially newly realized empaths to really take stock of your situation and try to detangle because.
11:43
Esther Bertram
You have so much capacity to do beautiful things in the world for others because of your big shining heart. But you can't shine brightly when you're. Caught up in one or two or three peoples agendas that just tax all your energy. It's much harder to have a bigger reach and feel great and healthy when that is consuming all your energy. So I'm on a mission to help as many empaths become one two threes as I can. So if i don't know if that theory makes sense to you, but that's how I created it to make sense for myself.
12:21
Esther Bertram
And yeah, sometimes it's simple. Things are very hard to put into place. That they sometimes help. So before we look into how to solve it, I want to jump into where it comes from in the 1st place. Why are we 2-1 threes or three? Two ones? Why do empaths become empaths or are we just born like that now? This is a whole subject of its own, but I'll do a very quick analysis from my perspective and I think there's two reasons where empathic one is born from trauma. So when people are. Born into a situation that they're not old enough yet to really work out how to. Be safe in a situation, but they sense any kind of danger you are programmed to be on high alert, like an animal.
13:14
Esther Bertram
It's animal instinct of survival, and I think that's a hard thing to shake off when you grow up. If you have that, as at a young age and. Being able to tune into the subtle energies and agendas of other people and almost pulled outside of yourself to feel into what's going to happen so you can place yourself within the reality in the safest position. This is something that stays with us when we're adults and something you need to unlearn and. Work out if you're safe or not now that you're an adult and kind of unwind that high alertness, which is, yeah.
13:56
Esther Bertram
This is a whole topic of another podcast. I won't go further into it. But that's one angle. One birth of empathy. Empaths is from trauma. The other, I think, really just comes down to being born highly sensitive. And this having this wider spectrum of sensors. So being able to tune into things outside of the normal frequency spectrum in the various senses that humans have and that can be genetic.
14:30
Esther Bertram
And it could be. Environmental and nurtured and natured. And sometimes some empaths have both. You have that sensitivity and you have the trauma and then you become a hardcore empath that needs to. Often do extra work because often it's very overwhelming. A lot of people like that end up turning to drugs and trying to numb it out because it's just very intense and a lot of therapy. Needs to usually happen. It's a kind of. Yeah, get through what it's like to make sense of those first impressions and experiences that we had and come to a nice balance as a adult and as a thriving empath. I think that's the whole purpose of a lot of empaths we want to get towards being fully thriving in our work life and love so.
15:30
Esther Bertram
What can happen if we're in tangling? Unhealthy relationships. It can be very toxic and especially being in hardcore 2-1-3 and double one two three. Intersections where. You're giving all your energy to just potentially one person. It's sometimes very hard to give up and change that because it's so consuming. It's almost like a black hole you can get sucked into it so strongly it's hard to hard to get out of. And often our self esteem is weakened at those at that stage as well, and we can feel depleted and very swayed by the ocean of emotion.
16:17
Esther Bertram
I always call it the ocean of emotion cause I see water as being a very emotional element and. As an empath, I relate to the concept of having other peoples emotions as the ocean and I like to see myself living on a happy island, which I actually now live on a happy island away from the ocean of emotion. But when we're in these tangled nations, it can be very like the tides pushing and pulling us and drowning us in their emotions. And yeah, we need to surf the waves or get on an island or get on the mainland to get away from it.
16:58
Esther Bertram
So the other really important thing is hearing our own inner voice because our inner voice knows what's best for our well being, but. When we're in tango elations, we only hear others much louder than ourselves so. I think on a philosophical level it's just not right or healthy for empaths to be in such dynamics for too long. Because we have so much more potential in us to be. Shining beacons for others, and we want to sustain our energy for a longer period. So I think heading towards as many mutually beneficial relationships as we can is a good aim to have purely because we have so much to give, not purely, but be as well as we have so much to give us empaths we have the biggest hearts and when we in mutually beneficial relationships it creates such a flowing energy, I always see it like.
18:04
Esther Bertram
An Infinity sign that just flows back and forward between the two people and friendships and work and relationships, and the byproduct of that is immense. It's beautiful and it's like golden energy that just you can flow into. Your cause or your impact businesses and. Yeah, this podcast is purely to try to help people get into more mutually beneficial and less consuming tangle nations so. A little bit about why this is important to me. I really struggled with this when I was younger. I when I was around 18 was in a really quite abusive relationship.
18:50
Esther Bertram
I'd moved out of home when I was 16 due to dynamics there that were easier for me to deal with if I just wasn't there. And but I ended up then. Not the best situation with somebody very complex and. I turned to marijuana at the time to escape it was just very emotional and abusive. That thankfully I got away from that and went to university. I studied music.
19:21
Esther Bertram
I started cleaning up my life. I was 19 then at the time. And feeling really great on a great path then because I started realizing more about my well being and. What I needed to do, but I still felt unprotected and I remember going to university and the lady at the office. She was quite grumpy all the time and. She's just the receptionist and I remember she would just say I don't know something really quite minimal and small to me. And I remember just crying about it all the time and I ended up with this really beautiful partner at the time and.
20:00
Esther Bertram
He gave me some advice. He knew I was an empath and how sensitive I was. He was a very intune loving and nurturing man. And he gave me this whole. Visualization to do which was putting myself in an egg. And he just saw how affected I was by external people's thoughts and feelings and actions. And anyway, I did this exercise. And if you wanna learn about this exercise, I've made a free meditation with it. And if you just go to theinzel.com THEINS E L dot com and look for free meditation, I have the whole egg meditation in there and it's really helpful for setting boundaries and detangling. Yourself and what I did.
20:52
Esther Bertram
I did it every single day on my way walking into the university. Until it became a body memory and I no longer had to visualize, it but our mind is such a powerful device that. If you repeat something enough and it becomes a habit, it becomes then a reality and it really helped me and that was the beginning of me. Taking responsibility for. My own reactions to actions and detangling from others stuff because that Lady she it wasn't personal. I think she was just very grumpy in her own life, but back then I was so young and open and naive to the universe and the life that I just was swayed and upset.
21:40
Esther Bertram
And I remember that was quite a strong recent confirmation to me that it was really important. I did some of this self work. Later on, when I was in my twenties, I'd travelled the world, becoming a musician, lived in Germany and moved to England. I ended up in that's when I gave birth to my theory because that's when I was with this other relationship. And it was very consuming and he was lovely but. On some levels and extremely charming and good looking and just fun. But so detrimental. I realized, OK I need to do more.
22:24
Esther Bertram
Work and have more parameters around that are going to protect me, basically from myself from my own weaknesses and inability to know my boundaries and how to protect myself and feel good and not end up in such dynamics again. And I ended up doing one year of transpersonal psychotherapy, then, and that. Was mind blowing and I was in my twenties and if anyone 's listening to this and you're young. In dynamics that drain your energy, I highly recommend starting to see a therapist or. Even an empathic, an empathic coach in our community.
23:08
Esther Bertram
Actually, there's a lot of coaches in there who have joined. Because they help you. They hold up a mirror. I mean my lady that I saw she was phenomenal. She was from France and. She just I went there 1st for my dream training because I did a lot of lucid dreaming and I wanted to understand more that realm and but it ended up going down a rabbit hole of a can of worms that seemed to never end and it's just phenomenal.
23:38
Esther Bertram
I love that year of my life for that experience. And yeah, also it was when I really decided I need to. Prioritise wellbeing and actively implement the 1-2-3 and yeah that was 20 years ago and it's taken Me 2 decades and I'm finally here now. I think that it's an ongoing process every day. I still have to make sure my numbers are in order. And anyway so. I'm going to give you a little bit of a three step plan now of just how you could start if you're in this situation. If you're listening to this and you're a thriving 1-2-3 I congratulate you because I know how hard work it is and I know what it's taken for me to get to this.
24:29
Esther Bertram
If you're listening to this and you relate to being in a dynamic that is. Draining for you, or it might seem like it. You're a 2-1-3 right now and you're with a 1-1-2-3 or any kind of dynamic that. Is you just if you think of the word toxic, you just know it is toxic on an intuitive level. I think you probably you might have even been drawn to the title of this podcast. It might be good for you to start this untangling process, and so you can have more energy and feel much healthier in your life. So I'll give you a three step plan to start detangling, and I'm going to put it in.
25:12
Esther Bertram
The three letters ACE because it does feel ace to be Detangled and ACE represents I talk about Ace in my book actually as well. Slightly in a different usage, but it is. A is awareness, so the first step. Is becoming aware of your toxic relationships and. Awareness can come from it depends what kind of mind you are, but it can be as simple as getting away from your situation. Walking in nature, removing yourself, going on a holiday, getting headspace away that you can just have perspective. Look at it from the moon. And justice that's all a can also be for audit. You do an audit of your life and look at all your relationships and see which ones are mutually beneficial, which ones you pour into, and you get absolutely nothing back.
26:10
Esther Bertram
Sometimes it's necessary if you have someone who's unwell or a child, or some sometimes it's. Obviously you'll know if it's something that you want to keep doing. And sometimes you'll look at them and even they can be family members. And you just think you just shake your head and think, ohhhhh, my goodness. I have been giving far too much into this and not getting enough back and therefore I don't have much energy for anything else but this dynamic.
26:39
Esther Bertram
If that happens, you know you have to start a detangling process. You might be someone who's very analytical and loves Excel documents and pro pros and cons lists. That's another way you can get awareness of these relationships and. Just put shot them all out and make a whole PowerPoint document for yourself about from a rational perspective, what's really going on. The other thing you can do is ask friends and family who really know you well and you know 100 % they have your well being as their as so important for them.
27:17
Esther Bertram
Then you can trust their opinion and you can go to them. You might not like the answer, especially if you're in a longer term relationship with somebody. It's like a push pull relationship you love, but you on some level you know it's toxic. Ask them to hold a mirror up for you and tell you the raw truth. Another thing you can do for awareness is, yeah, see your coach or a therapist.
27:42
Esther Bertram
As I said, you could join the Incel community. We have lots of coaches in there that might be able to help you. Even just leaning on an empath, a fellow empath, because a lot of us have been through this and. I would say wise and potentially older empaths who have gone through the work in the process and who are what I call 1-2 threes. They are really good resource because they've been through it and know what it feels like and what it takes to get out of that.
28:13
Esther Bertram
But basically it's getting perspective gaining perspective and awareness of what's required. That is step number one. The second step, C of the ace AC is calibration. So it's recalibrating. You do this with you do it with programs or engines or humans empaths. And starting a process of becoming A123 And I'm a absolute believer in my own theory because I'm living it. And it's putting yourself and your well being first, because you will have much more to give everybody if you do that over the longest period.
29:00
Esther Bertram
So you need to. Start working on some ways that you can adjust your life and tweak it like an engine. Maybe you have to give up some things or start some things where you know for sure that is putting your own wellbeing first. And this could mean some pruning of your relationships. I also like seeing relationships like a garden and there's a lot of things I see, like a garden actually, but it's like life seems to mirror back things so. Obviously all the time, but if you look at your life and your friendships and your family.
29:44
Esther Bertram
You're number two 's in your life like a garden. You can have a wild jungle of a garden with everything growing. And the weeds are growing and the poisonous things are growing in this suffocating the beautiful trees that bring all the fruit and the beautiful flowers that get no light. They're your toxic relationships and I'm actually not a very good gardener to be honest. In real life, I don't like pulling weeds or pruning. But in this metaphor, it's really. Conducive to your happy Garden State. Because if you can cut back those weeds, if you can prune those branches. If you can remove the poisonous fruits and. Thistles from your garden. You will get a much bigger harvest.
30:35
Esther Bertram
You'll have beautiful grass to sit on and enjoy much more. All of your high quality friendships and family engagements. Because life is precious, life is short. If you look at it, even if you live to 111 it is still a short window of time as a human on this planet, and I think we can do so much with that time if we live in. Manicured gardens, but it takes work anyway. Step three is E for engaging and that is when you engage new habits and practices and people. I'm not saying go and get engaged. I mean maybe you want to.
31:18
Esther Bertram
Maybe you've found your perfect partner then. Yes, great. I'm bringing the wedding bells over here for you. But just make sure they're mutually beneficial. So engaging in habits and practices that are really healthy and going to ensure and support your mutually beneficial relationship. And if you don't know how to do that, again councillor or a coach. Or a therapist can really help you set up those milestones and parameters and hold up the mirror for you. Because sometimes it's hard to see without somebody externally doing that for you.
31:56
Esther Bertram
So that's the three steps I would suggest to get started in your detangling process. One thing if you want to learn more about this and the ACE method. As I said, check out the one theory dot com my books currently on pre-order as I record this. Or you might be listening to this after it's been released. You can buy it there to jump further into that. You can join our community and connect with fellow empaths or even maybe find a coach there. The other thing you can do is download the meditation on the inzel.com and learn about the egg protection. And there are three extra takeaways you can do.
32:42
Esther Bertram
To lead you towards feeling detangled and. Thriving and just to recap of why we'd want to do that, you will have so much more energy. You'll feel great in life when you're not tangled like a spaghetti. You'll be able to hear your own inner voice better because the other voices will be quieter. You'll be able to set boundaries more easily. It's like when you've weeded a garden, it's much easier to see the weeds when they pop up. It's like having a boundary. You see it straight away and you know it doesn't belong in the garden, but when it's a tangle of craziness and wildness, you can't see what's what.
33:27
Esther Bertram
And it's very difficult to navigate sometimes. And yeah, when you have more energy for yourself, you'll have more energy for your loved ones. Your mutually beneficial relationships and you'll have a lot more energy for the world and you'll be able to sustain it over a longer period. Because, yeah, you don't want to be drowned in the ocean of emotion, because yeah, it's not very pleasant. And you want to be part of this new wave of super empaths and to be a super empath.
34:00
Esther Bertram
One of the core tasks we have to do is detangle, detangle. And then you can thrive. It's one of the core todos on the impact to-do list. And I can't wait to see all of my fellow empath friends and family thriving in all areas of your life because I feel like the empaths we can shine our diamond hearts really strongly. And help lead society from a heart lead. Perspective because there's been so much head leading and ego leading, and.
34:40
Esther Bertram
Ah, old guard leading and the new wave is coming through where intuitive heart, lead, peace, love and happiness. Leading is coming through and empaths have a big part to play in that will I see it like that anyway. And I'm we're coming towards the end of the podcast. Now I'm going to leave you with a little Christopher Morley's quote, which is no man. I'm going to put in an extra bit or woman is lonely, eating spaghetti. It requires too much attention. And that's exactly it, spaghetti.
35:19
Esther Bertram
As much as I love it and it's my favorite food actually it's so tangly and takes so much of our time, energy, love and attention, and it's much more effective to be a thriving 1-2-3 water fountain of love. Spending your time eating spaghetti. A lot of it then being tangled in it. And in the last episode I left you with an excerpt from my book November Fox. Who's a orphan vegan empath rock star travelling dimensions of dimensions of consciousness to understand the workings of a teleporting cube that takes her through realms of mind, heart, body, soul, purpose and facing her shadows. And one of the chapters when she's trapped between worlds and she has this moment where she finally gets to hear her inner voice is quite a cheeky inner voice, so I thought it's a good little excerpt to leave you with today for story time.
36:23
Esther Bertram
And then I'll wrap up a bit after that. So here's a little bit of November Fox following Joy. And her interaction with her inner voice. Where are you? Who are you? November inquired. I am your inner voice, my inner voice. She asked scrunching up her face. If you're my inner voice, why haven't you talked to me before? You haven't been close enough to listen to me. November lifted her head and looked at the mysterious talking floor and then placed her ear back down. I'm not sure if I believe you don't sound like me. Why do you have the voice of someone else? You're tricking me.
37:09
Esther Bertram
Test me. Challenge the voice. Ask me something, no one, but you knows well. I guess that will work OK. Give me a moment question me on anything. The voice was clearly enjoying itself. Ok, voice, what's my favorite food ever and where do I like best to eat it? Spaghetti I yelled at the screen. That is so easy. Laughed the voice. Where's your imagination? November was not sure if she liked the voice's attitude, even if it claimed to be her own.
37:47
Esther Bertram
If you are who you say you are, you should know the answer to that, she quipped Touche. You love tofu satay, but most of all pasta and you like to dine in Rome in that restaurant with the red chairs to be precise. The voice stated matter of factly I was pleased with myself that I too knew the answer. It was quite an easy one. Well, perhaps you're right voice, but why are you so separate from me? If you are me, I'm not convinced.
38:21
Esther Bertram
Imagine your mind has two sections. Your conscious mind that works more while you're awake, and your unconscious mind that is alive and processing while you sleep. November tried to imagine her mind as a picture with two halves. In her mental image, she put one half under the Sun and the other under the moon. I'm imagining the sides clever girl, the voice said with a hint of sarcasm. Now imagine the two parts as riverbanks on the river sails.
38:53
Esther Bertram
A little wooden boat. Ok well I am on the boat. November started to grasp what the voice meant. Although she still didn't understand how that would be possible. Suddenly something dawned on me. What if mother had left in search of the world of form? Perhaps she was on a similar boat attempting to cross the oceans of layered reality like I wish to do. What if she was a new baby in form already? My mind boggled at the possibilities.
39:24
Esther Bertram
So where am I in this picture? November asked, indulging the voice. Well, right now you're on the bridge that crosses the river, the voice said. And paused a moment. That is the reason you can perceive me. I am sailing down the river between the two hemispheres of your brain. You do sound familiar, but I can't remember when we met. She rolled over to change the ear held to the floor. Do you Remember Me telling you to apply for the scholarship for the Brighton Institute of Music? Asked the voice.
39:56
Esther Bertram
Yes, I remember if it was you saying just do it over and over again. I worried that a Nike ghost from one of their commercials had possessed me. Yes that was me. Or what about when I told you about mister Russell's accident before anyone else? Yes, a voice in my head told me when I woke up that very morning later I got the phone call confirming the sad news of his broken leg. I remember wondering how strange that I knew already. Yep, me again. With more memories emerging, November frowned. Was it you telling me I wasn't good enough for that first major concert? When I had the meltdown, no that was my evil twin brother.
40:40
Esther Bertram
Equiv is he russian? no. Well, where is he now? Let's just say that I accidentally forgot to bring two life vests on a sailing trip. We took a few years ago what? So are you saying that Ekov fell into one of my brain hemispheres? Well, yes, but don't worry, he can't swim. Goodness, voice. I'm not sure you and I are related. Be a warrior, not a warrior. That's a good one. Funny, it's the second time I've heard that phrase today. I'll remember that you may be useful after all, even if you are a murderer.
41:24
Esther Bertram
Takes 1 to no one. November didn't reply. As an image of Red Mevin flashed before her eyes, sorry, touchy subject. I should know better the voice said yes you should. Well, my apologies. Because I live on this river between your two minds, I access all your information, some of which is in the past and the future beyond what your conscious side knows. My heart skipped a beat. The voice talked of a place like loose atopia I could not believe it. Who was this voice? What do you mean beyond what I know the member queried? I can connect to all the memories you have buried in your subconscious. I can also see the future.
42:06
Esther Bertram
You see, my river runs into the ocean of the collective unconscious. The voice further explained. My job is to guide you since I can tap into all the places you can't. What on Earth is the collective unconscious? It is the universal library of all human knowledge. Every person has a river in their mind that leads to the collective ocean that we all share. Wow, it must be a gigantic ocean, November said, scrunching her brow, trying to grasp the idea of a place big enough for all human knowledge. All of a sudden it dawned on me that my plan to put a message in a bottle may just work after all. Since all rivers are connected and all go to the same enormous sea, surely I can send the letter through the Undercity canals in Nutopia.
42:53
Esther Bertram
Eventually it would be sure to find someone far, far away even if it arrives at a strange point in linear Tik tok. I felt without a shadow of a doubt that I must write this letter and put it in a bottle. Why can't I always listen to your voice? I mean my voice, so you can tell me the answers I'm searching for. November asked her cheeky, yet wise in her voice. Because you fill up your conscious mind with so many thoughts and inner chitter chatter, the voice replied.
43:24
Esther Bertram
November recalled the high priestesses words. Endless distraction. I call out to you, but all you listen to is your relentless chatter from your thinking mind thinking this planning that chat chat chat. November wondered if she actually chatted as much as the voice said, see. Even now, you're contemplating whether you chatter all the time, aren't you? Goodness, voice you honestly can read my thoughts. November said wide eyed at the idea. She again rolled over to give her squashed ear a rest. You'd be shocked to know how hoarse I get screaming out to the cacophony of your conscious mind's voices.
44:06
Esther Bertram
You don't realize that lemon soothers are hard to get here on the river. November laughed glad her inner voice had a sense of humour. She wished Klaus were here to share the moment with her. If you're really my inner voice, guide me now. What should I do? She asked, you're on the right path. Am I yes, you are. The irony is now that you're listening to me. We're no longer separate and I've done my job.
44:36
Esther Bertram
I'm now free to enjoy a leisurely cruise down my river. You're a funny voice. I am you and you are me. But now that I can hear you, shouldn't you make the most of the situation and tell me something important? November asked thinking it's strange her inner voice wanted a vacation the moment she could finally hear her. No the content doesn't matter. The key is the fact we're talking. Go on with your travels. You're a smart, kind person mostly you know what to do. She said. Then paused. Only one piece of advice what? Stop with your paranoia. You're no longer at the orphanage. You're safe now, remember that? Ok, I will try to.
45:26
Esther Bertram
I hope I can talk to you again sometime. Well, I'm always here streaming along. Yes, I suppose you are. Would you mind doing me a favor? Sure, what would you like voice but please don't ask for a fishing rod to fish out ekov. No, the voice laughed. I'm considering getting a waterproof amplifier and microphone. If you would check eBay for me that would be fantastic. Terrible wifi connection down. Here too much. Interference november laughed. Ok bye bye voice. Hasta La Vista replied the voice. November stood up, goodness me. She said aloud into the white room.
46:07
Esther Bertram
This place gets more and more interesting by the minute. She walked over to the picture at the back of the leaning block tower and touched it with her finger. In a flash, the vacuum of the scene engulfed her. Excitement overtook my being, imagining the possibility of writing you a letter and sending it to the collective ocean. Charlie and I did a few looped loops in the air. What a glorious day it will be if I ever find out that it reached you safely.
46:33
Esther Bertram
In that moment, I felt compelled to search for the paper to prepare my first documentation. And here I am telling you it all now. Although by the moment you read this, Tik tok may have unfolded to a later moment yet still no doubt a now in its own right. Perhaps you do not travel linear Tik tok after all. Maybe you just conclude that you do. It is all rather mystifying. So that was November Fox.
47:05
Esther Bertram
If you want to hear more of the audio book November Fox, just head over to either the website consciousfiction.com dot AU or just november fox dot com and it'll take you straight through to that page. If you've enjoyed this episode, I would love it if you could leave a review because what happens with reviews is the algorithm. Then if I get any positive reviews, it promotes it to more empaths. And if this brought you any value, hopefully we can share it to more empaths, especially young empaths who are struggling to detangle. Maybe this helps them speed up that process a little bit and I'd love it if it could reach them, so leaving a review is a lovely way for you to contribute to helping other empaths detanglers as well.
47:57
Esther Bertram
Ok, I hope you've liked this episode and I look forward to sharing more perspectives and thoughts and feelings with you in the next one till next time. Bye bye. Today's episode is sponsored by stepbystepguitarlessons.com You'll go to course if you're an absolute beginner and want to learn guitar. I have taught hundreds of students with my fast track method from ages 6 to 80 with lifetime access. These self paced online lessons mean you can learn in the comfort of your own home. The bite sized lessons are very easy to follow and the platform keeps track of your progress. This course is tailored for absolute.
48:38
Esther Bertram
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49:17
Esther Bertram
Not to mention if you've always wanted to be a rock star, learning guitar is your ticket to do so if you're ready to learn or want to gift it to a friend, head over to stepbystepguitarlessons.com and enroll today. You've been listening to Empath Unplugged, a frequent release podcast of RAW and philosophical reflections on wellbeing, love and the meaning of life brought to you by your host. Esther Bertram, founder of the Inzel, a rejuvenation island and community for empaths.
49:52
Esther Bertram
For more information or to join the community, head over to theinsel.com If you have found. Value from this episode and would like to become a patron to support future episodes and gain access to exclusive content. Only available to patrons head over to empathunplugged.com and sign up to be part of the inner circle. Thank you for listening. Have a beautiful and rejuvenating week till next time. Bye bye.